When I was still working in BigLaw, I couldn’t wait to chuck the Blackberry. I loathed how much power this little device have on my psyche. I longed for the days when I could extricate myself from it. The days have come and yet I am still very much tethered to it, the very same device I used while working at Simpson Thacher.
I still carry my Blackberry with me everywhere I go except to the gym. I thought about getting an iPhone after I quit, but I couldn’t make the switch. I was so used to the weight of the device and the way it fits in my palm. Believe it or not, I don’t feel complete without it.
I still place my Blackberry on the nightstand and use it as a flashlight in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.
I still reach for my Blackberry first thing in the morning. Scrolling down the messages has an uncanny way of waking me up.
I still feel anxious when the Blackberry runs out of battery or loses its signal coverage. A well juiced Blackberry with full bars makes me feel well prepared.
My heart still skips a beat when I see the blinking red light and I can’t help but to immediately check the new message. The problem is that when I am with company I can’t simply excuse myself and blame the interruption on work.
My physical interaction with my Blackberry hasn’t changed in the past three months, other than one major transformation: the dread has been replaced with excitement. Instead of receiving a potentially disruptive work email that could derail my weekend plans, the beckoning light may well signal an invitation for lunch or a notification of a comment for the blog.